Over the summer, we put the girls in some classes through parks and rec. In the past I'd put Sarah and Kate in the same classes but after watching them compete with each other I finally realized they should each have their own things to do. So, Sarah took Hip-Hop and Kate took Cheer. Both girls love to watch each others classes and even teach one another moves. Why didn't I have the idea of separating them earlier . . . Seriously though, Sarah and Kate are best friends; they do everything together. And Sarah was really crushed that she could not do cheer.
Well, when Sarah started kindergarten we learned that she could take Cheer classes through the school and even perform for the whole school at the weekly assemblies. Sarah was thrilled to have the opportunity to join the team! Thrilled until the first day of practice.
Cheer class begins 30 minutes after the kindergartners are released - so the girls going to cheer sit in the hall until Miss Jennifer comes to escort them to class. The cheer squad consists of girls from grades K through 5, and the kindergartners are very small even compared to the first graders.
The first day of cheer I packed Sarah and extra big lunch, snack and even an extra snack she could have while waiting for Cheer to start. I arrived early to pick her up and waited anxiously for class to end. When class was finally over out came Miss Sarah, looking rather ravaged. As soon as her eyes met mine she burst into tears. She was so upset it took a trip to Target Cafe and a Pretzel an Icee to make her feel better.
Cheer class was not at all what she thought it would be - nope, this wasn't three-year old cheer (aka skip in a circle, do a freeze dance, and learn a few chants) like she'd seen little sister do. This was big girl cheer. The first thing the girls learned was Ready Position. Which has them standing with their feet a bit apart and their hands behind their back and elbows out a bit. The girls are expected to stand in 'Ready Position' when they aren't cheering. And even worse, they were expected to keep their arms straight. Sarah was stunned.
As we sat at Target Cafe she talked and I listened. She said she'd never, ever, ever go back to cheer and that it's too hard to keep her arms straight and she was just so tired. Woah, what a disappointment!! We all thought this would be right up Sarah's alley. She LOVES to perform, and being one of only three kindergartners who gets to be on the team - how special!! She didn't care. She was too tired and she wasn't going back. As a mom this is a hard thing. Instinct says - protect your kid - if she doesn't want to go, she's not going. On the other hand, reason says - she can't just quit because it was hard.
As we talked I told her that Cheer is meant to be fun for her and that she did not have to continue going if she really had such a bad time. I explained that we had paid for the whole month so she needed to finish out the classes she already committed to - and if she still wanted to stop going at the end of September it would be just fine. Sarah reluctantly agreed.
There weren't any tears week two, but she still was not thrilled with the whole process and her tears were replaced with a bad attitude. Concerned that Sarah might be showing that same attitude to the teacher I decided to call and talk it over with her - Miss Jennifer said, the classes should be fun for Sarah and that all the younger kids are tired but overall Sarah is doing very well. Torn, I told the teacher that I feel Sarah should fulfill her commitment to finish the month, but I also don't want her disrupting class. We agreed that Sarah would finish her commitment and that if she was rude or disruptive she would certainly let me know.
Week three Sarah missed class to attend a classmate's birthday party. By week four Sarah's friend Beth had joined the team. Having a friend would certainly make it more fun . . . right?? That afternoon Sarah came out with the same bad attitude she'd had week two. Uuuugh. Okay, two more classes and we're done. Sometimes being a good parent and making your kid do the right thing is a real pain.
For week five, thinking that Sarah might just need her emotional cup refilled, we decided that I would meet her after school and bring her a fresh snack and outfit and spend a few minutes with her between school and cheer. This time, as I escorted her to the classroom she was actually sort of excited to go. Woo hoo! When we picked her up she was tired and the bad attitude seemed to be suppressed. Sarah said - "Mom, I want to try cheer again next week. I think I will like it if you can meet me after school again!!" Okay, I can do that, we only have one more week of cheer and then she can drop off the team and move onto another activity that she will enjoy. The next week, class six, Sarah was sick and missed school and cheer. Supermom was stumped. What to do, that was the last class she had committed to take - if she wants to continue she had to commit to another month. So we talked again and Sarah committed to try another month of classes, she still was not convinced that cheer was for her but she wanted to try again - provided mom picks her up at the gate, gives lots of hugs and kisses and brings snack and a change of clothes.
Class seven went okay. No major attitude afterward. She was grumpy and tired but wanted to go again.
Today, class eight, tired ourselves, Kate and I drug our tails over to the school and met our little diva the gate. She changed her clothes, had her snack then Kate and I walked her to class. At the end of class the girls received their uniforms and pom poms. The uniform is a simple blue tank top with double white stripes down the side. The skirt matches and the stripes from the shirt line up with the stripes on the skirt. Pretty snazzy. The girls were released from class in groups of three to go to the ladies room and try on their uniforms. Sarah was looking a bit tired by the end of cheer, rightfully so since she'd been on a field trip to Schnepff Farms today. When she received her uniform she promptly ran down the hall to the girls room to try it on.
A few minutes later, almost like a scene in a teen movie, the classroom door opened and Sarah stood in the doorway in the glow of the sunlight behind her. She wore an ear to ear smile as she sashayed in to the room. Her uniform fit like a glove and you could tell she was feeling pretty good. Kate and I raved. Of course Sarah hammed it up and recited a few cheers for us as we left the school.
As we passed the playground on the way to the car Sarah saw a few friends from class who attend AfterCare. "Kaitlin, Marissa!" Sarah called. And the two girls and a few more kids ran to the gate to see Sarah. They chatted for a minute about the field trip and then said their goodbyes and we started to walk away. As we turned, Kaitlyn yelled "Sarah, you're a cheerleader?!?" Sarah turned back, her hair blowing the wind, again like a movie, and said proudly "Yes, I'm a West Gilbert Mountain Lion."
And now she's committed. Sarah's a cheerleader.
Sometimes doing the right thing as a mommy does pay off. Sometimes all that worrying about forcing your kid to finish what they start and have integrity and all the battles with their attitude are worth it. Most of the time the pay-off will come when our little ones are grown (at least I hope it will.) But sometimes the pay-off comes today and we can enjoy the smiles our little ones are so happy to share.
I had done probably too much worrying about Sarah on this one. I knew she would love cheer if she could get over having to work for it. What I didn't know, was that all she wanted was a uniform and some pom poms.
The West Gilbert Mountain Lion Cheerleaders will be performing at an assembly soon. Hopefully Supermom, seeker of perfection, won't forget to attend and she'll remember her trusty camera . . . I really wish I'd have had it today when she was glowing the doorway.
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